3 months, 3 busy months, trying to find the right balance between my corporate job, delivering self tapes on time and having a life. I have had doubts during those 3 months, getting back into a full time corporate job, trying not to lose myself and mainly wondering why. My never ending question is "are you enjoying yourself" and I think I can honestly say "Yes" I have a day job that is all about people wellbeing and I still get to do some cool jobs modelling.
I have received numerous texts from friends telling me they had seen me in the tube and that was quite funny as at some point it became a game with my daughter counting the number of time we saw the TFL ad when on the tube. Very proud to be part of this campaign all over the walls in the tube. It is satisfying to be part of this campaign showing, a black couple, with locks, as everyday people doing an everyday thing. It sounds simple, normal, a non event, but it is not. I am modelling so that black people are represented at every level in society, doing everything and anything, as it is about time we are shown as we are, normal people, capable of everything and anything like anyone else. I took this video one evening at Bank Station, that had been closed for months and it was the first time I was back and saw this:
That made me laugh, if I wanted to be discreet I could not have done better. Anyway proud of this campaign, shared with my friend and model Cain @Cain, shot by Sarah M Lee @sarahmlee47 and casted by Sue Odell @scorpioredhair. Cool job indeed.
A lot of self tapes lately and I have done some cool jobs. I don't fret when doing my self tapes anymore as sometimes they can be very tricky, I give my best and try to be as relaxed and myself as possible and it seems to work. I have worked in 3 months, some jobs, I am still waiting to see and others have just come out. Like the cool summer ad for Co-op when I have my 10 seconds of fame but that I will own proudly. Sometimes I tell myself how ironic this is all, me an ex agoraphobic, I am now capable of catwalking in front of an audience, pose, act and interact with strangers as if I have been doing that all my life, as if I am super at ease and confident. It is not always easy but I am always super proud when I give my best and see the result, even if sometimes I am very nervous inside and old phobias creep up and threaten to sabotage me. Modelling is a great therapy.
Here is the Co-op ad: The only way is up!!!!
I have always said that this blog is for me of course and also for whoever wants to have a go at modelling, especially mature women, as we are too often discouraged to do whatever we want after a certain age. Well, I will keep on saying it, yes you can, yes you should and don't listen to anyone who doesn't want to see you happy, evolve. Do whatever makes you feel worthy and alive, now, don't wait for tomorrow. Do you, just do you, as there will always be someone to criticise but who are they if you do not know or love them, nobody. I have met people on set lately and shared all my contacts, tips, everything I have to help, because that is what we should do, help each other and hope to meet on set again.
I have had a conversation with a young woman that I love, my niece Ella @eh_labas who has started her own modelling adventure in Paris and she told me: "I am just watching you and trying". She is doing great, flying soon for a 5 day shoot in Bulgaria for a big brand, I could not be prouder. That is why I keep on doing what I am doing, writing about my experiences, sharing my tips on set to whoever wants to listen because you can do it too, in a healthy and safe way. See yourself with your own eyes not anybody else's, they don't know you.
Before I leave you, another job I have done that I am proud of. I often get contacted by young entrepreneurs/artists with small budgets who wants to use me for their projects and I am always humble and happy to help. Promoting BAME young entrepreneurs or artists is a joy of mine but also and above all a mission. We need to help if we can, knowing how it can be tough for BAME communities to make it. Let's keep on helping each other as it is better but let's not kid ourselves it is still tough when you're from a BAME background so we should be our best allies. I have had the chance and joy to work with @shopkem for their new campaign "Better Every Day" and it could not be truer. Let's empower each other!
Anyway, I am here, enjoying one day at a time, with people that I love and respect, I realise how blessed I am and just do me.
See, you very soon, in the meantime be well and happy.